Day 7 - Sore, Quiet, and Sleepy

Nope, not talking Seven Dwarfs here. Just me. It's all about me. Muhahahaha... *cough* Er, ehm... Anyway...

Nope, today I am sore. Yep, I am feeling the results of yesterday's 5K. Yeouch! Mainly the sides of my thighs and a little in the rear end section, but nothing my good friend Ibuprofen and some stretching hasn't helped. Besides, the pain reminds me of what I've accomplished so far. I can't help but be a little proud of myself. Through a lot of love, support, understanding, and struggle, I can say I am 29+ lbs lighter and have a 5K under my belt. That's huge for me! I've refused to give up on myself this past year, no matter how bad I felt, no matter how many times I've wanted to quit. Nope, I just keep finding ways to get past my hurdles, push myself a little farther, and make it to new milestones. I know that my current inspirations and momentum will hold up for quite a while. I also know I'll probably hit more roadblocks in the future that I'll have to fight through. I'm good with that.

I told one of the WW leaders yesterday, as I rounded the final turn of the walking path, that next year, I'm going to run the 5K. She smiled big and let out a loud cheer. Even with great encouragement like that, I still had an internal moment as soon as I said it. That little voice inside saying "Uh oh. Why did you say that?! What happens when you fail to run the 5K? You're going to hate yourself again. You're setting yourself up to fail again. Don't be an idiot!"

I hate that voice. Guess I'm going to have to prove it wrong. I admit it; I'm scared. Me? Run? A dream I have had since I was in high school. The last time I could do any kind of running was junior year of high school on the varsity soccer team. I remember we had to run a mile before practice, a mile after practice, sprints, drills, oh so much running for a good 2 hours each night. I remember how the coach would make the person who finished the mile lap last run it again. Guess who that was for the first few weeks. Then I started to push myself. It was hard, but I was determined -not- to be the last girl running. It worked. I was never the best, but I did make it into the middle of the pack by the season's halfway point. Then I quit. Not because I wasn't any good, but because the drama department had rearranged its schedule and I found myself with a lead role. Theater was my passion and I went with it. No regrets except one; because I didn't finish the season, I never received my varsity letter. Had the jacket and everything. My school didn't give out letters for theater, so I owned a letter-less jacket for years. Oh well. I know I made the team. Guess that's a success I need to remember, even after all of these years.

I will run the 5K next year. I know I can. Time to get past the fears and start working towards that dream. I need to push past the fear of failing; the fear of looking (and sounding) like an elephant on the treadmill; the fear of being judged and/or laughed at. Makes me wish I had an iPhone or other device that supported the "Couch to 5K" app some of my cousins and friends are using to help them achieve this same goal. Oh well, time to get creative. Time to set up a plan. Time to start... no, not start. Time to -continue- succeeding. Yeah, I like that better. :)

Weigh in day is tomorrow. I'm hoping for some good numbers to encourage me. But, for now, the experts say weight loss success starts with a good night's sleep. Can't argue with that. Sleep tight!