How Do You Walk The Path Alone?

I had to leave Weight Watchers in August due to financial reasons. Since then, I have just lost all focus, all motivation and all positive thought. I had reached my lowest weight in years (220.2) and now, a mere 3 months later, I've gained nearly 20lbs. I haven't even been able to think of getting on a scale in over a week now. I haven't been able to face the numbers.

I can't stop eating.

I can't get past feeling tired and sick which kills any motivation to exercise.

I don't want to give up, but I have to admit that this is the closest I've ever been to complete surrender.

I'm lost. I'm frustrated. I'm scared.

I am fighting against my own temptations, my own fears, my own feelings of failure.

I'm fighting against a family, though incredibly supportive, is not on this same journey and cannot (and should not) be put in a position to miss out on the things they love or the lifestyle they wish to lead. It's just hard being surrounded every day by foods and habits that contributed to my high weight.

I'm not getting any younger. This isn't getting any easier.

I need help and I don't know where to look for it anymore. No money to buy the help. All attempts at setting up buddies falls apart about as quickly as they get set up. I've exhausted what free resources I know of. I don't know what to do.

I don't want to give up. I can't give up. Please, God, don't let this end. Show me the path I need to be on now. Help me succeed.