Down, but not out. Never out...

Wow, has it really been 2 1/2 months since I last blogged?! Yikes! I do tend to hide away when things aren't going well. Looking at the date, that's probably what happened. I've been on such a rollercoaster ride these last several weeks in terms of eating, being on plan at Weight Watchers, being off-plan, exercising, not exercising, schedule changes, depression, emotional eating, personal discovery, a wedding, a death, a terminal illness diagnosis and the end of a revered family tradition.

Yeah... a little rough to say the least. I feel like I've hiked the Grand Canyon of stress and finally come out the other side, battered and bruised but (hopefully) triumphant. I'm back here blogging and refocusing my efforts; that (to me) means success. Ooo, that gives me a new equation to keep in mind for this next leg of my journey...

Persistance + Unwillingness to fail = Success

Some days, success isn't measured in foods eaten, Points+ tracked, exercise minutes achieved, or NSVs. On those days, it's the simple fact that I refuse to give up on myself completely. Last night was one of those days. I have been feeling very out-of-control lately; So much going on that I had no control over. I let my struggles with food and exercise motivation take a back seat to those emotions and (several times) just ate until I thought I would burst. My scale at home reflects that (from 216 to 222 in 2 weeks). I've missed the last two weeks of WW meetings, but I am determined to go in today to weigh-in (my local center is open from 11a-1p for WIs and purchases). I need to know what the "official" scale says before I get started on this holiday weekend! Food is already purchased, so I will have to work with what I have. But, I know my choices need to be more conscious and less "Screw it! I'm fat anyway. What's one more burger/handful of chips/ice cream cone?" At least I won't have the bag of my favorite chips staring me in the face. Of course, I have to accept the fact that I ate the whole bag yesterday. Ok, lots of water today to clear out the sodium. Step 1.

Step 2: Lots and lots of veggies! Fill up on veggies (and some fresh fruit) and keep the rest in check. Protein... lean... portioned. Staying away from the fatty "salads" (potato, macaroni, etc) and experimenting with healthier desserts (grilled pineapple on sour cream angel food cake with a dollop of sugar-free, low-fat butter pecan ice cream anyone?)

Step 3: Get my butt to the gym! I know that is where I'm most successful at working out. I have the time, the transportation and the membership to my local Y (with 2 locations nearby). I have no excuses to not pop in for 30min or so. I feel better. I look better. Why am I not doing this? Because I'm not making it a priority. That changes now!

Step 4: Get to my weekly WW meeting, no matter what the scale might say. I joined for the face-to-face support. Can't get that support unless I walk through the doors. Time to get back!!

Step 5: Wash, rinse, repeat and succeed!

Oh, maybe I can add in Step 4.5: blog on a regular basis. Just writing this blog for the last year has helped me so much and the tremendous support of the blogosphere (especially you, my reader) cannot be denied! Thank you for accepting crazy, chaotic ol' me into your world. As always, it means so very much to me. :)

Ok, time to put those steps into action! A quick weigh-in at my WW center, then a healthy meal, walking around the air-conditioned mall with my guys (hubby and son), then game night with friends. Time to get back to living my life with purpose and focus.

I hope everyone has a wonderful, safe and healthy 4th of July weekend!

~Heather